14 Weeks

I have spent the last hour reading my pregnancy blog posts from when I was pregnant with Weston. It's so much fun to go back and read. Especially now knowing the little squirt in there was Wessy Man. Seeing his ultra sound pictures. Remembering how scared I was for nine straight months that something was wrong....

It's actually reassuring to read all of that. Especially because I am having an almost identical pregnancy this time around. It's funny how I have forgotten though. I am not nauseated, I have a decent amount of energy. The 3 things that were bugging me around this time with Weston are bugging me again. Cramping, light headed, feeling fat and ugly.

Seriously, I don't want to go anywhere. My normal clothes are too tight. It's too early to pull out the maternity clothes. I get way bad zits when I am pregnant. I just want to hide. My boss wanted to get a nice staff picture for our Christmas Card today. I told him if anyone takes my picture in the next year I will chop their arms off.

This is a tough time in a pregnancy I think. You don't feel them kicking very much so I am always worried. I think more so this time around because of the miscarriage. I didn't realize how badly that affected my mentally. I keep thinking something is wrong. And I am nervous to tell people I am pregnant because it doesn't seem real. And I keep thinking if something happens, I don't want to tell people we lost the baby. So I kind of keep quiet about it. I don't care if people know, but I am not making a big press release about it.

I think it could all change next week. I hope finding out the gender will change my attitude. I hope all goes well. We are taking the boys with us. I hope they behave. I loved reading about Warren's response last time. He held my hand and was nervous, but excited to find out he was getting a brother.

I know it sounds cliché, but I really just hope this baby is healthy. After having a miscarriage, and knowing a few people loose children, I just hope we get a healthy baby. Deep down inside I think I was born to be a mother of boys, but we shall see.

Baby #3

We are super excited about Baby Fisher #3.
I had a miscarriage about 10 weeks before my first doctors appointment. While we were at the doctor we found out I was almost 10 weeks along. It certainly isn't common to get pregnant so quickly after a miscarriage. In fact, the nurse told us she'd never seen it that quick before. So we know this little squirt is supposed to be here!

About 6 weeks after the miscarriage, I felt pregnant, but didn't think it was possible. But a test said I was. I had some blood taken to confirm it, and the nurse said I shouldn't get attached to the pregnancy because being pregnant that quick after a miscarriage just doesn't happen. So we were thrilled to find out it was viable.

My doctor's appointment was on a Monday, and my sisters had a craft night that night. I was in charge of cupcakes. So I just added little ornaments to tell them. And I wore a little charm necklace.

When we told the boys, I sat them down and the conversation went like this:
"You know how mommy has been really sick and tired lately? I went to the doctor to find out why....."
Warren put his little hand up to stop me and said
"Please tell me he found a baby in your tummy!!!"
Me: "Yes buddy, he did."
He's so stinking smart.

The boys were thrilled. Warren really wants a girl. Weston really wants an orange baby. I want a healthy baby.

Fun fact

5 years ago on August 12, Andrew and I headed to Moab with our singles ward. That is when it all began. We were together every day after that until we were married. Now, 5 years later we will welcome our 2nd child on the same day. Kind of cute I think.

Last office visit.

Yesterday we went in for our last office visit. That was weird to hear the doctor say "no need to schedule another appointment with me next week. I will just see you at the hospital Thursday, if not earlier." Holy cow we are close!

With the little "leakage" scare we had on Saturday the doctor did a few extra tests to make sure the baby was ok. One thing he did was a quick ultra sound to make sure the fluid levels were safe. How awesome! It was super fun to see our full grown squirt on the big screen. I'm pretty sure he waved at us. It made me super excited to meet him!

All is well. It's just a matter of days at this point.

Ready or not.....

I had one of those "oh my word it's happening soon" moments this weekend. It just hasn't seemed all that real that baby #2 is on his way. 10 days at most!!! This may seem like TMI and a little graphic, so stop reading now if you don't want to read gross words. On Saturday I had this weird gush of fluid fall out of me. With Warren my water broke 2 weeks early so I know what it really feels like and this one wasn't like that. So I wasn't overly concerned but it made me a little cautious. The weird thing was it continued to leak for hours. So around 9:00 pm we decided to call the hospital to see if I should be checked. They told me to come in. So I got all showered and we headed to the hospital around 11:00 pm. Warren was asleep to Andrew stayed in the car with him. I was in the hospital for about an hour and a half. They said I was definitely leaking something. Sometimes at this point in pregnancy you can loose a little fluid, then it stops. Sometimes it means there is a little tear in the sack so be prepared to have the baby at any moment. While I was in the hospital I had 4 super intense contractions. The nurse said she would be surprised if I made it to the 12th.

Sleep

I laid awake for most of the night last night. Why can't I sleep?? Maybe it has something to do with the torn ligament in my upper rib cage that wraps around to my back. Maybe it's going to the bathroom every hour. It could even be the intense leg cramping I have been having. There is a possibility it's a full size baby in my stomach that loves to kick as hard as he can when I lay down. I wonder if it's because I am starting to panic because the big day is only 12 days away.... at most. Whatever it is, I can't sleep to save my life and I am exhausted. I think it's an Ambien night.

Whale

I feel like a whale. Is it possible to get any bigger? I think one of the worst things about being this massive is having to depend on help from other people. I am usually the type that won't ask for help or even take it if offered. Now I can't keep up with Warren. He is WAY faster than I am so I have no choice but to rely on other people for help. I can barely bend over to pick up toys. As much as I wish my house was clean I just can't do it. Part is because I don't have the energy, the other part is because I can't bend or reach a lot of things because my belly is in the way. 17 days...

3 weeks left!!!

We went to the doctor today. It was really weird to schedule my C-Section. It put into perspective how soon this baby will be here. August 12th is the big day, unless my water breaks or I go into labor of course. Crazy.

The appointment went well. I am barely starting to dilate.... sorry if you hate that word, but this is my journal and I'll write what I want..... nothing major though.

Here were my questions for this round:

1. Can I start taking my "baby blue" pills now to help get me ready? YES
I had the baby blues BAD with Warren. I wish someone would have told me to expect it. Apparently most women go through it, but are to embarrassed to admit it. Well, here I am admitting I was miserable for about 4-5 months after Warren was born. Had I known there was a magic pill to cure the depression, we all would have been happier. So, this time around we are getting ready early.

2. Can I go to Bear Lake this weekend? It's not recommended, but I can't hold you here. You run the risk of delivering in a podunk hospital but it's up to you.
So, we are going! Andrew said he'll drive fast if my water breaks.

3. I have been feeling sharp electric shock type pain shooting out my you know what.... Your babies head is right there, of course it can hurt and that's normal. Awesome (sarcasm)

4. I have a crazy pain at the top of my ribs that sometimes hurts so bad I cry. Your baby is kicking hard there. It could either be a cracked rib, or a torn ligament. His tone was kind of a "good luck with that" tone. You only have 3 weeks left.

So, that's it. We are almost there. Time to pack a hospital bag and a bag for Warren. The big difference this time around is I have to think about another child and where he can go while I'm in the hospital. What if my water breaks in the middle of the night.... who do I call?

I only have a few more things to do before baby boy gets here. I guess the biggest thing is decide on a name. Right now the front runners are James, Weston or Edward. I LOVE Edward and call him Eddy. I am just nervous people will think I am a Twilight fan and I can't be more opposite. I hate that crap. Andrew LOVEs Weston but I'm not sold on it. We both like James so that is more than likely what it will be. I guess we'd better decide soon.

The countdown begins

I can't believe we have 25 days left!!! CRAZY. I am super ready physically. Mentally on the other hand, I could probably use more than 25 days. My little What to Expect app on my phone has had 2 updates this week that I think are supposed to help get my butt in gear and ready. The first one was... "You only have 4 weeks left. Pack your hospital bag." Really? It could happen anytime now I guess. The other was "Plan your route to the hospital." I guess the time is closer than I realized.

Here is my physical state: I am so $%#* hot I can't stand it. I seriously can't believe how much sweat I can produce. Sorry if that's TMI, but it's true. I get more and more massive every day so I feel like I get even more hot every day. I have a pinched nerve at the top of each leg so walking is miserable. My ribs hurt so bad I wouldn't be surprised if one was broken. I am so tired and have no motivation to do anything. When does that nesting crap start??? I need it to kick in because I don't care that my house is a wreck right now which is SO not like me.

My mental state: Scared. I am nervous about so many things. I just babysat my brothers 6 week old baby for a couple of days and it was a rude awakening for how it is going to be here soon. I am terrified of the operation I am going to have. I am worried sick about my duties at work. I know the staff can handle it, but do I really want them to? NO. Over the past 8 years I have seen the Utah Open go from being a joke to an event that even PGA Tour members are apparently talking about and some have even called to try to play. I guess I can't do anything about it now, but I hope it all goes well.

I know it always sounds like I am dreading this second baby. I really am excited to meet him and to expand the family. It is just crazy to think that it's really happening.

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow. Apparently we get to set an official date for the delivery. We have talked about August 12, but we'll see.

OMH!!!

47 days???? Breathe!

Leg cramps.

I NEVER had leg cramps with Warren. I didn't even know it was a pregnancy symptom until this time around. I get them at the most random times. I got one in the middle of the night last week that was so bad it woke me up. The next day I felt like I had been beaten in the leg. Then the other day we were in out pool. I was just chatting with friends and me feet cramped. If I had been standing on solid ground it would have dropped me for sure. They keep coming and going. Some more mild than others, but any way you slice it it's obnoxious.

Humiliation

There are many things about being pregnant that can bring on humiliation. I have experienced a couple in the last few days.

1. I have peed my pants. Luckily at home so I could change. You ask how is that possible?? Well, when your baby is squashing your bladder while at the same time using it as a punching bag, it sometimes leaves you seconds to get to the restroom and I just didn't make it. Yes... I am sensitive about it.

2. I fell out of bed. You know when you get big enough it is hard to sit up to swing your legs off the bed to get out??? Well, I am there so I try to roll out. The bed we have now is a bit higher than the one we had when I was pregnant with Warren. The rolling out didn't work as well this time around. Yes... funny but embarrassing. At least Andrew was the only one who saw it.

30 week and glucose appointment

Today's appointment was long, but it went well. I had to do the second glucose test which was 3 hours. I had to go in fasting which made me sick, then they gave me that drink thing which made me even more sick. After a few blood tests I was REALLY sick. But, the good news is I passed. No need for the gestational shot!! Wahoo!

I have gained 3 pounds in 3 weeks. Awesome (sarcasm). I can't wait to get my massive butt out running again. The baby is facing down and will probably stay that way for the duration. I guess it doesn't matter since I have to have a c-section, but he's in the right position anyway. The doctor guesses he's about 3 1/2 to 4 lbs at this point and said "be ready for a big baby". Warren was only 6 lbs. 14 oz, so a big baby would be a little change. Everything checked out ok. We are to the point where I see the doctor every 2 weeks. I think time is going to fly.... I am certainly not ready so it's time to get my butt in gear because this little squirt will be here before we know it. At least I know I have time. Unlike my brother who got a call from his adoption agency on MOnday night saying he'd have a baby that next Wednesday.

I failed.

I have had the words "you failed" said to me two times in my life. Both thanks to my lovely children. I failed my glucose test yesterday. Could it be the fact that I can't get enough sugar when I am pregnant? I could eat an entire bag of marshmellows for dinner. I LOVE ice cream more than ever. I have been known to scoop out a spoon full of frosting and eat it from the can.... maybe even a couple of spoon fulls. I realize this has multiple consequences, but when a pregnant girl wants something.... GIVE IT TO HER. Consequences don't mean as much to me when I'm pregnant. Well, they were clear yesterday about this consequence. I have to go back to the doctor next week and sit for 3 hours. I have to fast before I go and get blood taken 4 times. LAME! I had to go back a second time with Warren too. Luckily I passed the second one. If I don't pass this time, I have to get shots every day. I have a few phobias in my life. Needles are one of them. I have been known to pass out in the chair before they even stick me for blood just because I am so scared.

PRAY FOR ME!!!

Turtle

I know I said I would try to complain less, so let's look at this as an observation instead of a complaint. I feel like a turtle lately. I usually run on one speed.... fast. I can usually clean my entire house from top to bottom and make it shine like the top of the Chrysler Building in 3 hours no problem. Now that we are in the beautiful trimester number three I feel like I can't do anything at a speed other than slow. It's driving me nuts. I think it's a combo of my ever growing mid section with a complete energy zap. If I clean one room in a day I feel like I have conquered all. Now I just hope to get toys put away before I go to sleep. I just cleaned my kitchen. It took about 30 minutes and all I can think about now is getting a nap. I think it's time to bring in the Molly Maids.

Sleep

How is it possible to be so incredibly exhausted, but still unable to sleep? Warren has been napping for 3 hours now. I have tried to do the same but can't do it. I am lucky if I get 4 hours at night. I am uncomfortable, but not enough to keep me awake yet. I think it's nerves.

27 Week Check Up

Besides the fact that we waited almost 2 hours to see the doctor, this visit went well. Here were some of the questions we had...


Q. If I lift something heavy (like my 35 lb. 2 year old) will it cause harm to the baby, or just me?

A. It won't hurt the unborn baby. It could just cause me to pull something and put me in bed, so be careful. How do I not life my little angel when he's looking up at me with massive blue eyes saying "hold you mommy, hold you!"


Q. How much Diet Coke can I really drink??

A. His answer was actually funny. "You tell me how much you want and I'll tell you if it's too much." I told him when I'm not pregnant I can easily do 6-10 a day. He said it really won't harm the baby at this point. Where it can cause problems is in the beginning where it can cause miscarriages. Now that I am well beyond that point, 2-3 is fine. If I have a bad day and need 4 we will all be ok. Fabulous news!


Q. You said you would deliver me at least a week early... what are the chances it can be sooner? I have a golf tournament to get to.

A. Again, with a chuckle.... we may be able to fib it a day or two more. So in my mind what he said is plan on it.


Q. How long after the surgery/delivery before I can drive?

A. 2 weeks..... followed up by another question from me?

Q. How strict is that rule?

A. Why, do you have somewhere you need to go?

Me: Yes, the Utah Open.

So to sum up the delivery/ drive thing.... I should be able to go to the Utah Open if all goes as planned.


Q. I am having a tough time breathing. Especially when I yawn it sounds like I am choking to death. Is that weird?

A. No. Your baby is already 15" long and your uterus is the size of a basketball. It tends to crowd your lungs.


Q. Is it possible this baby has already taken up residency in my ribs... I still have 3 months to go you know.

A. Yes, he is making his way there. He if facing up and down as opposed to sideways. SO, no wonder I can't slouch or breath or get comfortable no matter what I do.



He also told me about labor pains... since I have never felt real labor. With Warren my water broke 2 weeks early. So I was medicated before it all really started. Granted, I was in labor for 22 hours and my epidural wore off a couple of times, but I have never been at home or away from a hospital experiencing true labor. I never even had those Braxton Hicks things with Warren. He told us what to look for....... weird to be thinking about that already.

On our way out they gave me a bag with a bunch of info on pregnancy, nursing yada yada. There was a formula sample (wahoo since I don't nurse, I'll need all of those I can get my hands on). But, the best part was the tiny little new born diaper that was in there. Oh my word, my fist is bigger. It got me super excited!

So. There we go. All is well.

Amazing

This pregnancy has seemed so much different than my last. I realize I seem more complacent than the first time around. I think it is a combination of us not really being ready for baby #2 and the amount of responsibility we have now versus the last time. Now I have a 2 1/2 year old that needs constant supervision. He wants to be held, and that is getting more and more difficult. We own a business that we didn't when I got pregnant with Warren which brings on a whole new meaning of stress. I almost don't think about being pregnant as much as I did last time. I will be honest, life is so overwhelming to me right now the only time I think about this little guy is when he is kicking, or my body hurts so bad I can't go any further. Well, in the past week I have become very excited to meet him. As exciting as it is to feel this little squirt kick, it is a whole new ball game when we get to SEE him kick. Watching my stomach go up and down and all around is incredible. I have a feeling he will be active like his brother. Warren needs someone to keep up with him. So, after seeing this little guy in action this week I will try to be less of a complainer and more grateful for the little miracle that is less than 3 months away from making his big entrance!

Aching

Maybe this has something to do with the fact that I just put in a 52 hour week and it's only Friday afternoon (I love high school golf), but I am super achy (is that a word) today. My entire mid section hurts. My hips feel like they are bone on bone and I have lost any cartilage that was ever there. My back feels like it is one bend away from giving out. My head feels like I have been hit about 42 times with a baseball bat. I can't sleep to save my life. I am so exhausted I can hardly see straight. I can't cross my legs because the combination of enlarging thighs and my gutt doubling in size this week. Maybe next week will be better.

Oh my!!

My brother stopped by to see me at work yesterday. He was sitting in my office and we were talking about the summer. He was telling me about all of the trips he had scheduled. I volunteered to take his daughter for one towards the end of July..... he said "Ummmm, aren't you going to be like 8 1/2 months pregnant then?" Oh my word I thought. It is really happening. In about 90 days I will have 2 kids. I started to really think about the major surgery I get to have to bring this little squirt to the world. The last c-section I had wasn't planned, so I didn't have any time to really think about what was going on. Plus after 22 hours of labor and my blood pressure shooting though the roof I had slipped into shock a little and was so medicated I wasn't fully aware of what was going on. This time I will be much more alert and aware that I am laying on an operating table completely naked with about 15 people in the room while I am being cut in half to have a baby pulled out of me. Kind of made me panic a bit.